


Lost Cat

by noumenon



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: College AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-03 22:33:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2890430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noumenon/pseuds/noumenon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wash loses his illegal cat and York is absolutely no help. That hot guy with the dreads turns out to be helpful, though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost Cat

Washington was all but knocking on doors in the dorm trying to find his cat. Behind him, York was leaning against a wall and not helping whatsoever. 

“You know, you could at least pretend to help.” Wash stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. It stuck up from the sweat on his forehead from all the stress he was under.

“Yeah I know I could, but then again you could have not brought a cat into the dorm rooms.”

“Hey! It wasn’t just a cat, he was a kitten. And he was hungry and cold and,”

“And!” York cut in, “A total asshole. Seriously, how many times as Eps bitten you so far?”

“Epsilon only bit me a few times, and it’s because he was scared. Now help me find him.” Wash knelt back down and looked under the vending machine outside the laundry room. This was the last floor he hadn’t checked yet, and if he didn’t find Epsilon here he would have to start the search all over and get more people in on it.

“Hey, lose a quarter? I got change if you need it.” A new voice spoke up. Wash looked up to see the black boy with the killer dreads from his dorm he’d seen around a few times standing over him dropping coins into the soda machine.

“No. I’m looking for – something else.” Wash said quickly, he didn’t want to admit he lost a cat. He wasn’t exactly allowed to have a pet in his dorm room and he could get in huge trouble if anyone found out about it.

The machine shook and the boy shrugged. “Alright, if you need any help I’ll probably be here for a little while until my friend stops kicking the drier over there.” He pointed to the side where another student was in fact kicking a drier. “The doors stuck.” He explained. “And I know how to open them when they’re jammed, but it’s kind of funny to watch.”

York grabbed Wash’s shoulder’s and pulled him away from the stranger. “We’re good. We’ll leave you to pissing off your friend over. But if you find anything uh,” he glanced at Wash as though he would give him a good vague description of Epsilon, “really fucking mean, bring it up to room 217.”

“Mean? Do you want Church?” the boy laughed.

“He’s a bit too big. Right Wash? I think he’s not too big into bears.” York squeezed Wash’s shoulders as he teased him.

“York.” Wash elbowed him and turned around to push York out of the laundry room. “Thanks for your time and sorry to bother you!”

“Oh I get it. He’s more into my build.” The boy winked. “By the way,” He finally threw in right before Wash was able to leave, “My name’s Tucker.”

“I’m David, or Washington. Either is fine. This asshole is York and we’re leaving before he can be more of an idiot.” Wash said quickly over his shoulder before pushing York the rest of the way out before he could make any more snarky comments. He’d have a field day with Tucker’s comments if he let him.

Tucker grinned at the two and turned back to his friend who had stopped kicking the machine in favor of yelling obscenities at it.

“Hey come on, I want to see how much further the bear goes with the drier.” York complained when they were on the other side of the door.

“You can’t just talk like around strangers! You’re embarrassing me!” Wash hissed. 

“What do you care? It’s like you’re ever going to see that guy again.” A pause, then York almost jumped up in excitement, “Oh my god you want to see him again, don’t you?”

“No. I just met the guy. Shut up and keep looking for Epsilon.” Wash turned away from him but he was pretty sure that York could tell he was turning red in the face.

They got another few moments of silence before York decided to speak up again. “I don’t think your cat is in here. The only place we didn’t check was the laundry room.”

“I’m not going back in there.” Wash kept looking behind trashcans and recycling cans he’d already checked behind, even going as far as opening doors that the kitten couldn’t have possibly gotten through.

“Holy shit.” When Wash didn’t immediately react to York’s exclamation, he grabbed his shoulder again and pulled him to the windowed wall separating the hallway from the laundry room.

“Church, stop flirting with the drier and look at this. There’s a fucking cat in my laundry basket.” The windows muffled the noise, but Tucker’s voice could be made through it as he picked up a small blue-ish grey cat.

“I think you’re going to have to go back in.” York smirked victoriously at Wash who just pushed him gently.

“I’ll wait out here.” Wash insisted. “He’ll probably figure that’s what I’m looking for if he sees me out again, right?”

“Tucker, put that thing down. You have no idea where’s it been.” The other boy, Church was what Tucker called him, said. 

“Yeah I do. It’s been in my clothes. And it’s kind of cute.” Tucker stopped holding the tiny kitten by the scruff of his neck in favor of dropping him onto his palm right next to his face. Once the cat was freed, he hissed and clawed at Tucker’s face.

“Ow!” Tucker yelped, dropping the kitten back into his laundry. “Little shit.” Beside him, Church was laughing, his own laundry forgotten. “Hey fuck you, Church. Maybe I should name him after you. Church, the litte, little, shit.”

Inside his laundry basket the kitten was curling up and going back to sleep in Tucker’s warm clothes. “I think I want to keep him.” He said after wiping off the small droplets of blood from the kitten scratches.

“Come on, you better go in there before you’re going to have to sort out joint custody with your illegal cat.” Outside the laundry room York’s voice caught Wash’s attention.

“Shit.” Wash rolled his weight back onto the back of his feet as he tried to think. “Fine. I’ll go in there.”

York took the liberty of opening the door for Wash and grinned while Wash walked in. 

“Hey, bears fan. Look at this little asshole I found.” Tucker pointed to the cat. “This what you were looking for? I gotta say, wanting this guy makes a lot more sense than wanting a fat fuck like Church.”

“God I hate you.” Church said before going back to kicking the drier, though now it seemed like it was kicking out of frustration at Tucker than frustration at the machine.

“Yeah,” Wash turned away from Church and back to Tucker, “I uh, I got special permission from the RA to uh,” He tried to come up with a believe lie on the spot to explain his illegal pet but couldn’t stop fumbling over his words.

“Dude, I don’t care if you have an illegal pet. I’ll give the little guy back to you, but, I want to be able to pet new Church.”

“Oh my god; don’t call him that.” The kicking was louder and then the door popped open. “Fucking finally.”

“His name is Epsilon, actually.”

“Epsilon Church. He’s our kid so he gets both our names.” 

“Do you want to make an appeal for joint custody?” York spoke up from his spot at the door.

Wash decided against responding to York in favor of pushing him out and closing the door. York dramatically pressed his hand and face against the window making a show of looking depressed and lost. A smack to the glass knocked York off and he frowned.

Now that York was finished being a child, Wash walked over to Tucker’s clothes to pick up Epsilon. “Church isn’t a bad name. But wouldn’t it be weird to name a pet after your friend?”

“What, and naming him after a frat thingie isn’t weird at all?”

“Tucker,” Church spoke up, “Epsilon is a Greek letter. How the fuck did you even get into college?”

“Uh, my good looks? I mean come on, who wouldn’t be around this?” Tucker sent a wink to Wash as he said that. “Right Davie?”

“David. Or Washington, Wash is fine too.”

“Whatever you say, Davie.” Tucker grinned.

Washington rolled his eyes and picked up the kitten by his neck so he wouldn’t start scratching again. “Do you like the name Church? Scratch Tucker if you don’t.” He held Epsilon near Tucker’s arm and moved his grip on his small body to grip his torso. It wasn’t even a second before Epsilon hissed and reached out to scratch Tucker. 

“Hey!” Tucker yelped and jumped back. “You know what, fuck it. I don’t want our kid and I want a divorce.”

Wash laughed a bit, and worked on calming Epsilon down by petting him gently.

“Don’t you have to be married, or at least date before you can get a divorce?” Church asked. He seemed to have forgotten all about the laundry he had finally freed.

“That’s a good point. Wanna go out sometime? Obviously the better Church will have to remain under joint custody of the two of us until we break up, but I think giving it a shot is best for the children.” Tucker suggested. 

Church shook his head, clearly annoyed and probably a little done with Tucker, like this was a normal thing for him to pull. “Possession is nine tenths of the law or something, just take the damn thing and leave. Tucker is an idiot. You don’t need to humor him.”

Wash looked between the two of them for a few times, trying to figure out how much they were being serious. “I, uh. Are you being serious?”

“Me?” Tucker asked. “Hell yeah. Wanna get coffee? I’m broke as fuck so it’d have to be on campus. We can get the little guy a leash and bring him, people would love him.”

Wash scrunched his eyebrows together, thoroughly confused. “Sure? Except for the part where we bring Epsilon.”

“Good enough for me!” Tucker took out his wallet and threw a few coins at Church. “Take my shit upstairs I’m taking this guy out.”

The coins that missed Church clanged as they hit the metal behind him. “You’re a shit, and I’m not taking your clothes upstairs for a dollar fifty.”

Tucker groaned and reached for one of the coins that had landed on the floor, but Church put his foot on it. “Nope, I’m keeping the money. Take your shit upstairs and take this guy out before he realizes you’re a fucking douchesucker.”

“I... have to bring Epsilon back to my room anyways.” Wash offered up. “Actually,” he continued, “Can I borrow a towel or something? I can’t let my RA see him.”

Tucker dug out an ugly towel and threw it to Wash. “There ya go. I’ll come get it from you once I put my stuff away. Room 217 you said, right?”

“Yeah. Thanks. Uh,” Wash wasn’t sure what to say next, but Tucker was clearly willing to fill in the blanks for him. Tucker got on his toes and leaned forward just enough to press a quick kiss to Wash’s lips. 

“No problem, hot stuff. I’ll see you again in a few minutes.”

**Author's Note:**

> you like to read? me too! please give comment for author to read.


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